Saturday, April 12, 2008

what is it about turning 40?

i turned 40 back in october. ugh. i was hating it.

I look at myself in the mirror and wonder where I went after becoming someone elses remote control for the last 10 or so years. Life has a way of taking you over and you dont even know it- it took turning 40 to figure that out and so I'm trying to unload and get happy with myself again.

since then, it seems that i've been looking back and trying to grab pieces of my youth and reinstate them. its not that i'm trying to be 25 again, although i loved that age. its more like I am attempting to get back my youthful spirit by doing some of the things I used to do to make myself feel good. and there is nothing at all wrong with that.

I've let my hair grow out - and got more blonde highlights. I even did the funky dark red dye underneath. ooooh! new hair always makes you feel good in my opinion. I've been dieting and trying to drop the XX pounds I've gained since becoming a new mom at 30 (may i say that I have dropped 2 sizes-loving that - but I still have a way to go to look like I used to) I hate the left over baby pooch. its a fat magnet.

We will be joing the gault recreation center soon to get in some exercize, as a family.

LOL - i even started hitting the tanning beds again. OMG. i know. dont say it. all i have right now is an all over body burn. i know how i used to tan easy so i know it will come around in a few days. I forgot how much i loved having a little healthy color. It used to make me feel good. but its been so long since my skin has seen the sun (even living in florida!).

who knows - tomorrow i might even polish my nails.

40 isnt old. its not so bad.

5 comments:

  1. I did the spray tanner at the tanning salon instead of the tanning beds. It is the one where you go in the booth, hold your breath, and 20 little nozzles spray self tanner all over you in a nice even coat. It was pretty cool, didn't streak, and lasted about 7 days.
    I know how you feel though. I am hitting 36 this summer, and I wonder what happened to the bright eyed optimisim of my youth? I just have to think I am on a journey to somewhere, and I am visiualizing good thoughts, and hoping that in the end, I will look back and see it was all necessary.
    BTW, the kids won't take off the outfits! :-)

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  2. I JUST HAVE TO SAY HOW SORRY I AM THAT YOU HAD TO HEAR ABOUT MY DOGS, I AM a very sensitive person and wouldn't for the life of me put up with them, but these are strange times, and i think all life is precious, deer rabbits mice, all kinds of critters. i own a cat and you have to be sensitive to own a cat

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  3. awe - i wasn't offended about the dogs - but glad you feel that way about the lives of animals.

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  4. i also needed to say i'm sorry for my dogs, my dad said i need to tell you they are kind and gentle to humans, and when kept on a leash don't cause any harm

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  5. awwwwwe! you guys are too funny. Thanks for being so genuine about it. But its all ok!

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